Un escroc sophistiqué ~ par TPO

 

Un escroc sophistiqué ~ par TPO 

()()()()()() 

 

The Sins of the I R S ! ~ by TPO

 

 

 The Sins of the I R S ! ~ by TPO 

[] [] [] [] 

 

<< 2022 >> ~ par Hénock Gugsa

 

<< 2022  >>   

~ par Hénock Gugsa  ~

 

Happy New Year ~ by Hénock Gugsa

 

Happy New Year ! ~  by Hénock Gugsa 

You made it ! 

Monica Belucci parties it up!

 

Carson vs Webb ~ by TPO

 

Carson vs Webb * ~ by TPO

(((((( + - / * ))))))

H A P P Y    N E W    Y E A R  !!!  

* Johnny Carson vs Jack Webb 

Des grands publicitaires (genius admen)! ~ de TPO

 

Des grands publicitaires (Genius Admen)!
---------------------------------------------
"Avec la pâtée casimir,
mon chien a le sourire !"
🤔 🙂 🤪 

 

The Lightening Repartee! ~ Paul Lynde

 

The Lightening Repartee! 

~ Paul Lynde (Hollywood Squares) ~

 

 

The Giant Tap-Dancing Noses - by R O H

 

The Giant Dancers from Shostakovitch's The Nose
~ by The Royal Opera House ~
================= 

 👯 Happy Tapping !

     To celebrate, enjoy this brilliant clip of the giant tap-dancing noses from The Royal Opera's The Nose!
     Shostakovitch's opera is a surreal and brilliant work about a man who wakes up one morning to find that his nose has gone missing.

 

With Seagren, the Trainee ~ by TPO

 

With Seagren, the Trainee ~ by TPO 

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A Porcupine in Alaska ~ by "Humanity"

 

 

A Porcupine in Alaska ~ by "Humanity" 

{}{}{} 😮🙏  {}{}{}

     A porcupine was recently caught poking around the visitor center at Alaska’s Katmai National Park & Preserve. How about some fun porcupine facts?

⭐️  A porcupine, aka Needle Beaver, has approximately 30,000 quills on its body. (Not a hugger. We repeat. Not. A. Hugger.)
⭐️ Myth busting. Porcupines cannot throw their quills. Don’t get us wrong, they can throw some sassy barbs, (Porcupines are vocal critters and create a wide array of sounds, including shrill screeches, coughs, groans, whines, savage insults, teeth chatters, and low grunts.) but alas, no quill launching. However, on occasion, loose quills will fall out before it strikes, creating the illusion that they're being shot out. Geez. That was a long way to get to the point.
⭐️ The most popular porcupine hobby is quilting.
⭐️ What a slow poke. Porcupines are slow, attaining a maximum speed of two miles per hour.
⭐️ Porcupines have a strong odor to warn away predators, which it can increase when agitated. The smell has been described as similar to strong human body odor, goats, or some cheeses. (Oh, hey pal. Didn’t see you standing there with……expired goat cheese?)
⭐️ Baby porcupines are called "porcupettes.” That is all.
     Image: Prickly visitor (porcupine) clings to railing outside the visitor center.

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Source : "Humanity" 

 

What to Make of Golf ~ by Hénock Gugsa

 

 

What to Make of Golf ~ by Hénock Gugsa 

😔😡😩

     "The point of golf is to play the  least amount of golf possible."  - Anonymous

This is true ... the players prefer:
1) that someone (a caddy) carry their clubs and give them tips on what irons to use, where and how to swing, etc.
2) not to exert too much energy getting from one hole to the next ... little golf vans are de-rigueur!
3) to be able to smoke Cuban stogies and conduct capitalist business with their banker or trading partner, etc.
4) inside the country-club, some refreshing martinis before and after a round of golf ... and later a decadent dinner in front of a fireplace and lovely music being piped in to set a relaxing ambience!  

 

                                             

 John Rahm's Amazing Hole-in-One !

Types in a Men's Room ~ Anonymous

 

Types in a Men's Room ~ by Anonymous

()()()()()()()

Sociable Man :    joins friends in a piss whether he has to or not, figures it don't cost anything!

Excitable Man :    shorts have twisted around, can't find opening, rips hole in shorts.

Cross-eyed Man :    looks into urinal in center, pisses on man's shoes on left, flushes urinal on   right!

Timid Man :    can't piss if anyone is watching, flushes urinal pretending he has pissed, comes back later when no one is around !

Indifferent Man:    all urinals in use, pisses in sink!

Clever Man:    no hands, shows off by adjusting tie, looks around for admiring glances.

Frivolous Man:    pisses up and down and across urinal; attempts to hit flies; this type has never grown up. 

Absentminded Man:    unbuttons his vest, takes out his tie, and pisses his pants!

Sneaky Man:    farts silently while pissing, acts innocent, knows man at next urinal will get blame.

Bold Man:    farts long and loud while pissing and then laughs the same way!

Childish Man:    pisses directly into water at bottom of urinal, likes to hear bubbling sound.

Tough Man:    bangs tool against sides of urinal to knock off last drop.  Bangs it too hard, leaves in pain.

Bashful Man:    pisses down leg so no one  can hear it run urinal.

Inquisitive Man:    not interested in his own job, but insists on looking over at next man's tool.

Cock-proud Man:    stands well back so that all can view his outsize tool.  Finishes up with a   prolonged shake and replaces tool with a flourish.

Nervy Man:    grunts and breathes heavily, finally ending up with a resounding fart and thereby spoiling your piss.

Violent Man:    shakes tool after piss with such gusto that hat falls over his eyes and drops of piss fly in all directions.

Retiring Man:    pisses in urinal in most secluded corner and occasionally glances over shoulder to see who's looking.

Dejected Man:    hangs head and enjoys a good long piss.  Probably a hen-pecked husband enjoying the only thing that his wife can't interfere with.

================================

 

An Irredeemable Case ! ~ by Emma'nKen

 

An Irredeemable Case ! 

~ by Emma'nKen ~

 

A Strange New Trend ~ by Alison Green

 

  A Strange New Trend ~ by  Alison Green *

()()()()()()() 

Few people are as knee-deep in our work-related anxieties and sticky office politics as Alison Green, who has been fielding workplace questions for a decade now on her website Ask a Manager. In Direct Report, she spotlights themes from her inbox that help explain the modern workplace and how we could be navigating it better.  

In today’s topsy-turvy job market, a strange new thing is happening. Employers are increasingly grumbling about job seekers “ghosting” them. These job candidates just don’t show up for their scheduled interviews. And in some cases, new hires accept a job only to disappear.  

Here’s some of what I’ve heard from managers:

    I’m in the medical field and this is happening to us to for the past year 6–12 months. Being ghosted for interviews, people not responding. Five people scheduled to interview, but one shows up. We’ve even hired people who didn’t show up in the first day or didn’t return for the second. Nurses and front office positions. It’s unreal.

    I went from working at a nonprofit to working for a vendor. … Part of my job is hiring, but I’m having a much harder time hiring now than I did at the nonprofit. The pay and benefits are better—we start people at more than the max rate at the nonprofit, hours are more consistent, and we offer good PTO, matching 401k, and insurance. I’ve sent out over 30 offers to interview. Nine agreed to interviews. Three didn’t show up, two failed background checks, two didn’t want to travel … and we’ve made offers to the other two but neither has responded to accept or reject. I’ve never had so many people just not respond or not show up. Is this the new normal? … I’m at a loss and feeling really discouraged.

    I’m hiring for multiple hourly entry-level manufacturing jobs, well above local minimum wage with PTO, benefits, etc. If I reach out for a brief phone interview, only 50 percent respond. If I set up the interview, it’s no longer shocking when someone doesn’t answer the phone. … THEN once I offer a job … nothing. No response. I don’t get it.

Employers, unsurprisingly, do not like this. It’s rude, they say, and unprofessional. And sure, it is. But employers have been doing this to workers for years, and their hand-wringing didn’t start until the tables were turned.

For years I’ve fielded questions from job seekers frustrated at being ghosted by job interviewers. They would take time off from work, maybe buy a new suit, spend time interviewing—often doing second, third, and even fourth rounds of interviews—and then never hear from the employer again. They’d politely inquire about the status of their application and just get silence back. Or they would make time for a phone interview—scheduled at the employer’s behest—and the call would never come. When they’d try to get in touch about rescheduling … crickets. It’s been so endemic that I’ve long advised job seekers to expect never to hear back from employers, and to simply see it as an unavoidable part of job searching.  

But now that the situation is finally reversed, oh the schadenfreude! Here’s a smattering of what workers have written to me about the turnabout:  
    Honestly I LOVE seeing potential employees treating employers the way employers have been treating their candidates for years! And then seeing the employers get all upset about it like they haven’t been behaving exactly the same way. … I really really hope that employers learn a lesson from this and start respecting job seekers a little more (although I’m not optimistic).  

    Maybe this will help employers clean up their act. Honestly, in all my years working and interviewing for jobs, I’ve only had a handful of companies get back to me after an interview. I’ve had so many just go AWOL after an interview that I thought that it was normal employer behavior, and that a company getting back to a candidate to say they were not proceeding was going the extra mile and never something to be expected.  

    If it’s unprofessional and rude to ghost someone in business communications, then why have employers been doing just this for years? It seems perfectly rational to conclude that since they have been ghosting applicants for years, therefore ghosting is normal and acceptable in business.  

    If employers wanted to be treated better, they shouldn’t have spent the last three decades treating candidates with such little humanity. You can’t treat an entire class of people like crap for decades, strip them of rights and protections, and then be upset when we don’t show enough deference to the people asking us to beg for work.  

    Given how many jobs I took the time and resources to apply to, research and show up for an interview who then never bothered to thank me for my time or let me know they filled the position, I can’t even summon up a little bit of empathy for this.  

It’s also worth noting that in many cases, the reason employers are having trouble attracting candidates who stick is because what they’re offering—in pay, benefits, hours, or other conditions of the job—simply isn’t competitive. It might have been competitive a few years ago, but it’s not in this market, and they haven’t updated their thinking to account for that:  

    I work in the public sector and we are seeing plenty of candidates disappearing. Although we have worked on pay the last few years, we are not competitive. Our governing body became very used to the job market conditions during the recession and for several years after where the employer had all the leverage. They are only now beginning to realize how the roles have reversed.  

    For example, we have been trying to fill one of our entry-level positions for the last year:  

    First go-around: no qualified applicants.  

    Second go-around: four qualified applicants, only two showed for interviews. Offered the job to both and they declined.  

    Third time’s the charm, right: We hired somebody and on their third day they didn’t show up to work. Never contacted us and wouldn’t return our calls.  

    Now we’re in the middle of try number four. We have a conditional offer but the candidate has pushed the start date back twice. We’ll see.  

It remains to be seen how long these market conditions will last. But if getting ghosted helps employers better understand what they’ve been doing to job seekers for years, that’s a good thing. And if it reflects a real shift in power toward workers, that’s even better.

* Source: slate.com

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 Hénock Gugsa's comments ...===>  I have been down this road before and many times too!

For years, I couldn't figure out how or why I was not getting any response even as a professional courtesy.  After all, I went to great length preparing a resume, a covering letter and presented an application.  Sometimes, they required you to fill out an application form along with affidavits of one sort or another ... and you have to complete everything prior to the due date.  Alas, no dice!!!  So I developed a theory they must be throwing my application material in the wastepaper basket or shredder for one logical reason:  They could not pronounce my name, it was a foreign (an ALIEN) name and they could not handle that!  They were not even curious to meet me!

This does not mean there were not exceptions, i.e. good humans in HR departments ... and were it not for them, I wouldn't be here after decades in gainful employment and enjoying retirement!

 

Au barbier ! ~ de TPO

 

 Au barbier ! 

~ de TPO ~

Just for Laughs ~ by Nino Gigolashvili

 

      Just for Laughs !

    by Nino Gigolashvili, Townlife Magazine
    ================================

     After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to the local grocery store. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local store manager:
     Dear Mrs. Harris:
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in our store.
We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store.
Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:
     1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.
     2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
     3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
     4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.
     5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
     6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
     7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
     8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
     9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
     10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
     11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.
     12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look' using different sizes of funnels.
     13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
     14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed;
'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
     15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the fitting room?
And last, but not least:
     16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile; then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

 

A Madman's Ramblings ~ by Eli Weiss

 

A Madman's Ramblings *

~ by Eli Weiss~

 

     "I never understood wind. 

     You know, I know
     windmills very much.
     I have studied it
     better than anybody
     else. It’s very expensive.
     They are made in China
     and Germany mostly.
     —Very few made here, almost none,
     but they are manufactured, tremendous
     —if you are into this—
     tremendous fumes. Gases are
     spewing into the atmosphere. You know
     we have a world
     right?
     So the world
     is tiny
     compared to the universe.
     So tremendous, tremendous
     amount of fumes and everything.
     You talk about
     the carbon footprint
     — fumes are spewing into the air.
     Right? Spewing.
     Whether it’s in China,
     Germany, it’s going into the air.
     It’s our air
     their air
     everything — right?
     A windmill will kill many bald eagles.
     After a certain number
     they make you turn the windmill off.
     That is true.
     —By the way
      they make you turn it off.
     And yet, if you killed one
     they put you in jail.
     That is OK.
     You want to see a bird graveyard?
     You just go.
     Take a look.
     A bird graveyard.
     Go under a windmill someday,
     you’ll see
     more birds
     than you’ve ever seen
     in your life."

_________________________

* D. Trump 

12/21/2019

Asheville Poetry Review

    

 

Life Is Good ~ by Jodi Orgill Brown

 

Life Is Good ~ by Jodi Orgill Brown 

[on Facebook, August 28,2021] 

{} {} {} {} {} {} {} 

     I bought rocks yesterday. A 10 or 11 year-old girl stood in front of her apartment with a sign, “Rocks for sale.” My first thought was, “if she’s selling rocks, she must not have much else to sell”.  

     I got out of my car and went to ask about her rocks. She said she’d been there for 2 hours, but no one had even stopped. And that was after she had already gone door to door trying to sell the rocks. Her sign said that each rock was $5, so I grabbed a $20 bill and handed it to her. She sheepishly responded that she didn’t have change for $20. I told her change was not needed as I was going to buy 4 of her beautiful rocks.

     Immediately she started to cry. As tears streamed down her face she told me that her family had a cat, but they didn’t have enough money to take care of it. Her mom said the only way they could keep it was if she earned the money for the cat food. She couldn’t believe I was going to buy 4 rocks, but that with the money she would be able to keep her favorite pet. She thanked me profusely, but the tears had already rewarded me well. As I left, she packed up her table and treasures and went inside. All day I thought about the difference $20 made in her life. I think I’ll keep those rocks forever.
     When I had my brain tumor, even a little text message could give me hope to keep fighting. No act of kindness is “little” when you are in need. I wish I could buy rocks everyday. 

                                                                         💙💙 ❤️❤️ 💙💙

 

Hanasaka Jiisan - - - - a Japanese folk tale

 

 Hanasaka Jiisan - - - - a Japanese folk tale 

[] [] [] [] [] [] []

                  [The story of the old man that made the flowers bloom.]

     An old childless couple loved their dog. One day, it dug in the garden, and they found a box of gold pieces there. A neighbor thought the dog must be able to find treasure, and arranged to borrow the dog. When it dug in his garden, the dog uncovered only bones, and so he killed it. He told the couple that the dog had just dropped dead. 

     They grieved and buried it under the fig tree where they had found the treasure. One night, the dog's master dreamed that the dog told him to chop down their tree and make a mortar from it and pound rice in the mortar. He told his wife, who said they must do as the dog asked. When they did, the rice put into the mortar turned into gold. The neighbor borrowed the mortar, but his rice turned to foul-smelling berries, and he and his wife smashed and burned the mortar.

     That night, in a dream, the dog told his master to take the ashes and sprinkle them on certain cherry trees. When he did, the cherry trees came into bloom, and the Daimyo (feudal lord), who was passing by, marveled at this and gave him many gifts.

     The neighbor tried to do the same, but his ashes blew into the Daimyo's eyes, so he threw him into prison; when he was released, his village would not let him live there anymore, and he could not, with his wicked ways, find a new home. 

 

The Cutting Humor of Jackie Mason

 

The Cutting Humor of Jackie Mason