T P O

T   P   O
The Patient Ox (aka Hénock Gugsa)

G r e e t i n g s !

** TPO **
A personal blog with diverse topicality and multiple interests!


On the menu ... politics, music, poetry, and other good stuff.
There is humor, but there is blunt seriousness here as well!


Parfois, on parle français ici aussi. Je suis un francophile .... Bienvenue à tous!

* Your comments and evaluations are appreciated ! *

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Governmentium ?! - by TPO







 
New Periodic Table Element Discovered *
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Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 – 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each re-organization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

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* Source: newparadigmdigest.com

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

"To boldly go ..." - by TPO




Unfiltered from Here and There (***)
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compiled by
TPO

*** Warning:  This posting is suited for mature readers only.

There are these three guys. One is on his way up a hill to get to the local house of ill-repute. One is already there at the house, and the third is on his way down the hill away from the bordello. 
What are the nationalities of these three guys?

The guy on his way up the hill : Russian.
The guy in the whore house : Himalayan.
And the guy on his way down the hill : Finnish.

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For almost all of my single life, I had belonged to the Lutheran Church.


But when I married my wife, I converted to her church, which at that time was called the Reformed Lutheran Church of America.  In order to be an accepted member, I had to attend classes first.


At one of the first sessions, the Minister conducting the class
asked, "What must we do before we can expect forgiveness from sin?"


I replied, perhaps too quickly, "Sin ???"

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Answers to questions in school ...

Q. How can you delay milk turning sour?
A. Keep it in the cow.

Q. What does ‘varicose’ mean?
A. Nearby.

Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed.

Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman Emperor.


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From American courts as recorded by court reporters ...

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He’s twenty, much like your IQ.

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?